TOPIC: Rules on how to drive on the 401 to Toronto

[racmbs]

1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name: it is Trawna

2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 am to noon. The evening
rush hour is from noon to 7:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on
Thursday morning.

3. The minimum acceptable speed mostly is 120 kph. Anything
less is considered "Wussy".

4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Toronto
has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the
loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the
biggest tires go second. However, SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms
ALWAYS have the right of way.

5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear
ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.

6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another
offense that can get you shot.

7. Road construction is permanent and continuous on the 400
highways. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment
pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving
a bit more exciting.

8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks,
dogs, cats, barrels, cones, celebs, rubberneckers, shredded tires, cell
phoners, deer and other road kill, and the coyotes feeding on any of
these items.

9. "Map Quest" does not work here, none of the roads are
where they say they are or go where they say they do, and all the
highway off and on ramps are moved each night.

10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them
to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
activated."

11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 130 in a 100
kph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.

12. Do not try to estimate travel time, just leave Monday
afternoon for Tuesday appointments; by noon Thursday for Friday; and
right after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning.

13. The Chinese philosopher Confucius says: "Rush hour is
when traffic moves the slowest.

[golfingoalie]

yes guy

[Grass Roots Tour]

Now you've got a topic that bugs me every flippin day.

1. Chances are if you drive for a living, you are among the WORST drivers on the planet.

2. If your mail gets sent to the middle lane of any 400 series highway, you SHOULD be shot.

3. If someone is ABLE to pass you on the right side of your vehicle that means YOU ARE IN THE WRONG F'n LANE and should move over ASAP.

4. If you are traveling at less than 120km per hour you should not even try to merge with traffic yet. Drive it like you stole it on the on ramps. It is much easier on everyone if you get that bucket o bolts up to crusing speed BEFORE merging.

5. Please, someone ... anyone. Do something about this weak-a$$ 100km speed limit. Vehicles are way safer than they were in the 60's when speed limits were set. Heck, the roads are even way better. The 407, at least, should be 160km minimum.

[bythehour]

5. Please, someone ... anyone. Do something about this weak-a$$ 100km speed limit. Vehicles are way safer than they were in the 60's when speed limits were set. Heck, the roads are even way better. The 407, at least, should be 160km minimum.

I was with you all the way until this one. 160km/h is fine for new cars and autobahn-burners, but not everyone drives Bimmers and Benzs. Hell, ever try going 160 in a Toyo Yaris or Honda Fit? Not very comfortable.

Safety is not the only consideration; emissions and environment is another. Going 160 will burn a lot more gas; not sure if the reduced run-time would offset the decreased fuel efficiency.

[cdnputter]

7. Road construction is permanent and continuous on the 400
highways. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment
pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving
a bit more exciting.



I've always liked weaving through the barrels. :cool:


3. If someone is ABLE to pass you on the right side of your vehicle that means YOU ARE IN THE WRONG F'n LANE and should move over ASAP.

Amen brother!

[racmbs]

2. If your mail gets sent to the middle lane of any 400 series highway, you SHOULD be shot.

Since when did you buy a Blackberry? :rofl:

[goshawk]

Since when did you buy a Blackberry? :rofl:

He's talking about "snail mail"!!!!:rofl:

[Grass Roots Tour]

I was with you all the way until this one. 160km/h is fine for new cars and autobahn-burners, but not everyone drives Bimmers and Benzs. Hell, ever try going 160 in a Toyo Yaris or Honda Fit? Not very comfortable.

Safety is not the only consideration; emissions and environment is another. Going 160 will burn a lot more gas; not sure if the reduced run-time would offset the decreased fuel efficiency.



See my post on Mazda 6 to fix your issue with 160km. :D This car aint even breathin heavy at that pace.

Even better, get yourself an '02 Ford Thunderbird Supercoupe. That car crusies at 200 all day long. Smooth as silk boxers on a hot asian woman. :p Nascar is still using that body style. And it aint governed at 200 either. :hush:


However, I do agree that the current weak-a$$ speed limits are due to those of you who drive old cars and those who refuse to maintain their cars. Shoddy tires will certainly make your vehicle unsafe, esp on rainy days.

He's talking about "snail mail"!!!!:rofl:

YUP! No crackberry in my golf bag. :p

[mirak]

I was with you all the way until this one. 160km/h is fine for new cars and autobahn-burners, but not everyone drives Bimmers and Benzs. Hell, ever try going 160 in a Toyo Yaris or Honda Fit? Not very comfortable.

If you can't drive at 160km/h, then move over to the right lane....

[racmbs]

IN between the sheets in Paula Creamer's king size bed.

If you can get past all the body hair, I guess she's cute. :rofl:

[Grass Roots Tour]

If you can get past all the body hair, I guess she's cute. :rofl:


From the guy with no hair on his chicken legs ........ :eek:

[LowPost42]

If you can get past all the body hair, I guess she's cute. :rofl:

I'd happily get past her hair, iff'n I was single. :eek:

[simar]

i do think we need to readjust the way the speed limits work to a set of new speed limits by lane. if you are in the right lane, you can be doing as low as 80kmph but no higher than 100kmph. the middle lanes between 120-130, the left lane 140 to 150. with speeding tickets starting at 20 over for each lane....

[dekker]

This isn't about the car. It's about the driver. Most any car will do 160 safely,but the driver is a clueless twat at that speed who couldn't avoid a stopped car if you painted a line on the road for him.

[Bellyhungry]

My ex-boss once said to me: To be safe, be the fastest driver on the freeway because you will be in total control of yours and everyone else's destinies.

[dekker]

My ex-boss once said to me: To be safe, be the fastest driver on the freeway because you will be in total control of yours and everyone else's destinies.

That is a common enough morning 427 scenario. But what if the guy beside you had the same boss?
Use the Force Luke!:rofl:

[Bellyhungry]

That is a common enough morning 427 scenario. But what if the guy beside you had the same boss?
Use the Force Luke!:rofl:

427 does not have long enough stretch to let the Nitrous Oxide to kick in...427 requires drifting-skill rather than speed :D

[Golftime]

If you can't drive at 160km/h, then move over to the right lane....
If you want to drive 160 in the current environment on the highways then you should not be allowed to have a license. Driving either faster or slower than the norm both cause big problems. Go with the flow and use your intelligence to avoid using your brakes and the traffic will improve. We would all be much better off if we could get along and cooperate to keep the speed at the limit.

[hogannut]

1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name: it is Trawna


2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 am to noon. The evening
rush hour is from noon to 7:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on
Thursday morning.

3. The minimum acceptable speed mostly is 120 kph. Anything
less is considered "Wussy".

4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Toronto
has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the
loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the
biggest tires go second. However, SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms
ALWAYS have the right of way.

5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear
ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.

6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another
offense that can get you shot.

7. Road construction is permanent and continuous on the 400
highways. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment
pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving
a bit more exciting.

8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks,
dogs, cats, barrels, cones, celebs, rubberneckers, shredded tires, cell
phoners, deer and other road kill, and the coyotes feeding on any of
these items.

9. "Map Quest" does not work here, none of the roads are
where they say they are or go where they say they do, and all the
highway off and on ramps are moved each night.

10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them
to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally
activated."

11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 130 in a 100
kph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off"
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.

12. Do not try to estimate travel time, just leave Monday
afternoon for Tuesday appointments; by noon Thursday for Friday; and
right after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning.

13. The Chinese philosopher Confucius says: "Rush hour is

when traffic moves the slowest.


You also forget that on and off ramps can be used as passing lanes during rush hour, which is between 7 am and 7 pm.

[mccho]

I believe that the speed limits of 60km/h and 100km/h were set because those are the speeds at which fuel consumption is most efficient.

I find it ironic that many people here oppose the "let the fast drivers through on the left lane", while at the same time applaud the "slow golfers on the course should waive the next group through" philiosophy.:D

[dekker]

What I find interesting is that nobody talks about a gas shortage anymore.
They talk about gas prices yet none drive conservatively.SUV's blow by at 140 all day long and I can't remember the last truck doing less than 120 or staying in the right lane. Nimby's rule this side of the ocean.

[Biffm1]

You also forget that on and off ramps can be used as passing lanes during rush hour, which is between 7 am and 7 pm.
I live downtown, and I can say that rush hour is 6:00 am till about 3:00 am Monday to Sunday inclusive. Oh, and the street you live on will have a streetcar stopped so the driver can get a coffee in the morning, and a movie company will be set up to do a shot there when you get home.

[WILL]

Now you've got a topic that bugs me every flippin day.

1. Chances are if you drive for a living, you are among the WORST drivers on the planet.

2. If your mail gets sent to the middle lane of any 400 series highway, you SHOULD be shot.

3. If someone is ABLE to pass you on the right side of your vehicle that means YOU ARE IN THE WRONG F'n LANE and should move over ASAP.

4. If you are traveling at less than 120km per hour you should not even try to merge with traffic yet. Drive it like you stole it on the on ramps. It is much easier on everyone if you get that bucket o bolts up to crusing speed BEFORE merging.

5. Please, someone ... anyone. Do something about this weak-a$$ 100km speed limit. Vehicles are way safer than they were in the 60's when speed limits were set. Heck, the roads are even way better. The 407, at least, should be 160km minimum.


Most of you are close but this guy nailed it. :D

[Leftygolfer30]

Most of you are close but this guy nailed it. :D

Dude, you need to see a doctor about your split personality disorder! :eek:

[WILL]

Dude, you need to see a doctor about your split personality disorder! :eek:


Muuuaahhh ... Muuu uuu ahh aaahh aaahhhhh.

My profile still says Im right handed so I gotta be somewhat sane :D

[Big Shooter]

If you want to drive 160 in the current environment on the highways then you should not be allowed to have a license. Driving either faster or slower than the norm both cause big problems. Go with the flow and use your intelligence to avoid using your brakes and the traffic will improve. We would all be much better off if we could get along and cooperate to keep the speed at the limit.

Sounds like the "Monkey Expert" that Dane Cook jokes about!! ;) :D

[Golftime]

Sounds like the "Monkey Expert" that Dane Cook jokes about!! ;) :D
Can you explain what you mean?

[Big Shooter]

Can you explain what you mean?

There's always "an expert" who will give you the opposite/by-the-book side of the story! ;)

p.s., check out Dane Cook's stuff, Very Funny!!! :D

[WILL]

Personally, I think it's unsafe to drive 47km in a 4 lane divided roadway marked 50km max. You're going so darn slow you're bound to be gawking at your PVA while drinkin a coffee, readin the paper and eatin a muffin.

Now OTOH if you were doin say 65km in that same 50 zone you'd have your eyes peeled lookin for cops.

Who's safer ?